Sunday, March 13, 2011

3 posts rolled into 1...

So, whether it's out of laziness, lack of time, or emotion, I am rolling 3 posts into 1 tonight. Over the past week, I have been on the emotional rollercoaster - being high and happy one moment, and barrelled over by a tidal wave of sadness the next. So, here goes...

Last night, for the first time in years, I hung out with some of my most favorite girls. They have been beside me through difficult times and happy times. These women are full of integrity, love, laughter, and contentment. We spent the evening reminiscing about old times, catching up on their lives now, and laughing.

We had been planning this get-together for months, and had finally settled on a day, time and place. All of a sudden I realized that our night out happened to be on another very important day in my life: Drew's birthday. While he is the best part of me, and the love of my life, I definitely dropped the ball on his 29th birthday. Not only did I have a girls night when I probably should have had a night in with my guy, but I accidentally purchased him a ladies golf bag (purple no less) in a very hurried shopping trip. In my defense, the purple looked like a nice royal blue, and I had a salesman help me buy this ladies bag for my husband's birthday. He was able to exchange it, and got some new clubs to go in the bag, so I think he is happy. Needless to say, I am really going to have to step it up for his big 3-0 next year...

As I was looking at these beautiful pictures of my beautiful friends, I also realized the main reason for my great sadness after 4 years of losing Lynn. Several years before she passed away, she decided to take a trip to Cancun with two of her life-long friends when I was there with my mom and dad. The girls let me tag along during an evening of dinner and dancing. Some nice Mexican gentleman offered to take our picture - for a fee, of course - and we all purchased a copy. I hadn't really thought about it much after arriving home after the vacation, until, that is, I saw the picture hung on her corkboard above her desk when I went to Aspen to help plan her funeral. I quickly realized that this picture meant a lot to her, and since then has become very special to me as well. It was the significant transition from simply being a little sister to being a friend. I miss the chance to talk with her about the joy and frustration of raising two boys, I miss the chance to laugh with her about the latest pop culture mishaps, and I miss the chance to hug her. I have so many memories full of both happiness and sadness - mine alone to cherish.

In the end, it was a hard week. A good week, but hard. I love my friends - the are part of the reason that I am the woman I am today. I love my husband - he puts up with my shit and poignantly helps me through my bad days. I love my sister - still. Even after losing her 4 years ago.

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